Megan – Did you ever consider suicide?

Yes, that was also, the pain was quite intense, and there was a point where nothing was working. You know, I had gone to specialists all over the country and everyone told me there was nothing they could do. And I finally went to, he was one of the preeminent pain specialist in Houston, Texas, and he basically told me that I was crazy, that I was just making up the pain for attention, and that kind of pushed me over the edge because I knew the pain was real. I didn't want to live with it any more. I don't think I necessarily at the time thought, "Oh, I want to die," but I didn't want to live the life that I was living. You know the life I was living evolved into pain and a lot of prescription medication, and it just it wasn't what I, I was not fulfilled with life, I didn't want to live like that. You know, I mean, that was the bottom. I realized, you know, that a lot of people would be upset if I were gone and that, I mean basically the thought that, you know, after all that my friends, and my mother and my family had done for me, that I would just say I don't care and give up. You know that's what was kept me from doing that. So you know, it was hard but at the same time, I mean, I think it's very easy to allow yourself to fall down that hole sometimes, but then if you realize that's it's usually just a temporary thing, that life can get better and does.